The Complications Of My Life
by JudeFan006
Summary: Jude's turning 18, and everything in her life couldn't be more complicated! Her sisters dating her producer, she's dating her best friend Jaime, her 3rd album is getting to it's final point, and she's starting to fall for Tommy... again! What's a girl to
1. The Start Of My Day

Disclaimer: I don't own anything affiliated with the television show Instant Star. I only own the plot of this story. I do wish I owned Tim Rozon though…..don't we all?

The Complications Of My Life

"Jude, you know it's always been you" he whispered softly into my ear. I closed my eyes and just savored the words. His arms were wrapped tightly around my waste as we looked out into the distance. It was perfect. He was perfect. Sometimes I had to turn around and check to make sure who's arms I was really being held by. And every time I met those gorgeous baby blue's, I knew. I knew that this was where I was meant to be. Forever.  
"I love you Tommy" I stated bluntly. I wasn't sure If I should have said it. But I did, and I sure as hell didn't regret it! I felt him run his hands through my hair. It felt so good. "I love you to, girl" he replied sincerely. I sighed happily. Could this be anymore wonderful? "And that's why….." he started and began to trail off. I turned around to face him. "And that's why…." were not the best 3 words for a girl to hear. He stared intently into my eyes. Oh how I love those eyes. "I want to be with you for the rest of my life" he finished. I could feel a huge smile spread across my face. Then, he bent down on one knee and took by hand in his. "Jude Harrison, will you marry me?" he asked, as he pulled out the most breath-taking diamond ring I have ever seen. I knew by then I was bawling like a newborn child. He was romantic, adorable, smart, fun, and he wanted me! ME! I broke my gaze for a moment, contemplating. "Will you love me for the rest of my life?" I questioned. "No" he replied sternly. My face fell. My smile faded. The joy and happiness that was once there was replaced with sadness and sarrow. He wouldn't love me for the rest of my life?…..  
"I'll love you for the rest of mine Jude" he said. Those were most definitely the sweetest words I have ever been told! That wide, broad smile was returned to my face. And I squeeled with happiness. "Yes! Of course I will marry you!" I shouted. After he slipped the ring on my finger, he stood and embraced me in a warm hug. We spun around and around, both knowing this was what we wanted. I was filled with delight, courage, love…..It was the happiest moment of my life. Then, It was ruined. Torn away forever.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

I sleeply turned over in my bed, pulling the covers over my head, burrowing. "No…Tommy……" I groaned. "Jude! Get up now! And turn that stupid alarm off!" Sadie Harrison yelled from the room to the left of mine. That was when I sat up. Trying to register what I had just dreamed. It seemed so real. I slowly looked at my obnoxious, buzzing clock and smacked it annoyingly. It dropped to the floor and the noise it was once giving off stopped. My head hurt. My stomach felt all weird. I brought my hand up to my head and rubbed my forhead with the heel of my palm. "Thanks for finally listening!" Sadie ranted, as she entered my room. "You have….." she looked at her crystal embroided watch from Tiffany's, "47 minutes to get showered, dressed, and descent looking enough to be seen in public! Hmm, better hurry" she finished, as she left in a hurry. I moaned and my head fell. I didn't want to go anywhere. I didn't want to have to record or sing or whatever. Heck! I didn't even want to get out of bed today! But, I had no choice. So goes the life of being me. Complicated, boring, emotionally exhausting……the list can go on. Trust me! My life is never easy. My sister is dating my producer (yes, the one I just dreamed of proposing to ME!), my best friend Kat moved to New York to persue her fashion career, my mom and dad divorced, my dad married some push over named Yvette, and finally…..I'm dating my best friend, Jaime! Surprising? I know. We do care and love each other though. At least I think we do……  
We've been dating ever since the release of my second album. The third one's still under construction. I do love Jaime. I know I do! But I still can't help but think, If I love him as much as I say I do, why do I have exotic dreams about Tommy! It's all so screwed up! Oh! And did I mention I'm turning 18 in two days? Yep! The big one eight! Exciting huh! No, not really. I'm dreading it. G-major's going way out of the box. Throwing this huge party in honor of me. We've tried that, remember. Didn't go so well. I suppose I will have to show up though. Just to be nice….Now, I must go get as my over-bearing sister would say "descent". I'm in for another day of having to see Tommy, having to get chewed out on my album release date, and dealing with E.J.'s annoying styling tips and ideas about how I should look at my party Friday. Joy! Great Joy!


	2. Preparing

ch.2

G-Major always seemed the same. Nothing was ever different about it. Usually... As I entered the front doors, the first thing I noticed was a mass of people I didn't even recognize running around everywhere. No doubt E.J.'s business. "Jude! Just in time!" I heard a familiar someone shout out. Speaking of E.J. I thought. "Hey, what is all this?" I asked, gesturing towards everything surrounding me. "It's for you! Your party's only two days away. Better to have everything planned and ready than to wait till the last minute! Well, that's what I always say" she said hastily. "Ok...then what am I supposed to do? Wheres Tommy?" I asked. E.J. kept looking around in all directions, avoiding me basically it seemed. "Oh, he's around here somewhere...Now don't put those over there! I told you they go in the far right corner! Not against a wall! That just looks stupid! uhhh!" she yelled frantically, as she took off towards a man holding a big vase of Tulips and babies breath. I couldn't help but let out a laugh.

"For someone whos going to be 18 in a couple days and taking on more responsibility and not to mention alot more stress, you sure seem happy" Tommy said. I turned around to face him and smiled brightly. He always makes me smile for some reason. "Tommy!" I exclaimed and practically jumped into his arms. "Whoa! whoa! Ok to much love here Jude..." he joked. "Sorry...I just, It feels like I havn't seen you in forever" I stated honestly. He shot me a confused expression. "You saw me last night...in the studio" he said. I laughed slightly. "I know, I know but your always with Sadie these days" I blurted out. I didn't mean to say it and immediately regreted it. I noticed how his jaw tensed up and his eyes glazed over. Giving off a unreadable look of what was almost anger. "I guess it would seem that way" he responded bluntly. I suppose I deserved the hint of sarcasm and truthfulness his words held. But it still hurt me. "I...I didn't mean for it to...I'm sorry if I..." I just couldn't seem to find the right words. "It's cool, you just focus on your party and writing the final song for your album" he said, smiling warmly. "Got it" I simply said. For a moment we just stood there. Staring. Not always at each other but still it was a bit awkward. Then the sound of my over-acheiving sister broke the moment. If you could really call it "a moment". "Tom, You were supposed to pick me up for lunch! You didn't show so I had to drive all the way over here! And to find that the reason you never came was because you were chatting with my sister!" she exclaimed. "I forgot, sorry..." Tommy said with pleading eyes. I still don't know how he can put up with her. I don't know how I even put up with her! "Sadie chill" I said. Her eyes directed to me at once. "Just because your turning 18 in two days doesn't make you more important Jude, but out of our convo" she said. I shook my head and just laughed. "Sadie, you might be pretty, smart, and perfect to other people but you couldn't be more immature, selfish and pathetic to me" I said in disgust. It felt good telling her off! I had wanted to do that for a very very long time.  
"Sadie, go wait by the viper I'll be there in a sec" Tommy said. Reluctantly she did as he said and scoffed off, pouting. "Jude, why can't you guys just get along for once? I mean is it so hard to be civil to each other" he said. I thought about what he said for a moment. Why was it so hard for me and Sadie to get along? She was my sister. I love her right. I look up to her, I'm supposed to admire my older sibling. We should be like best friends. But we're not. I've never felt completely secure with Sadie. I can't trust her. I can't rely on her. I can't talk to her about my problems. It's sad. Really sad that we can't bond or even tolerate each other. The hardest part of it all is wondering if it's all my fault. If I'm the reason why we're not close. And if it is me, how am I supposed to fix it?  
"Jude? Jude..." Tommy said as he waved a hand in front of my face. His gesture brought me back to the real world. "I...we just never have had a good relationship...me and Sadie" I said carefully. He nodded his head. Maybe he understood. Maybe he has similar problems with his siblings. This thought made me think even more. Does Tommy have any brothers or sisters? I've never talked to him about his family or his background. Other than knowing he was a former boy bander, I really knew nothing about Tom Quincy. "Do you have brothers or sisters?" I asked, semi going off the subject of me and Sadie. "I had a younger sister. She died about 5 years ago." he stated sternly. But I knew him better. He was hurting inside. Every time you think about a loved one who has passed on you hurt inside. It's just part of being human. You can't help it. "I'm sorry, I didn't know" I said, looking down at my feet to avoid his stare. I could still feel his eyes penatrating right through me though. "She had cancer. The doctors did what they could. I invested thousands of dollars in getting her the best treatment. Didn't help, I still lost her" he said, his voice cracking. I almost thought he was going to break down and cry. But he didn't. Before I even got to tell him how I felt about what he went through he interuppted. "Listen, I gotta go. I won't be coming in tomorrow, got some stuff to take care of. But I'll see you at your party." Then he smiled and walked out the front doors of G-Major. I felt so sad for Tommy. I'm sure the last thing he wants now is sympathy. He has always had trouble letting his emotions show. He locks them up inside and keeps them there. If he would only release some of it I know he would be a better person. Not that I'm saying he's a bad person! He's one of the best people I have ever met. It's just, he needs to feel.

I stood there for probably 30 minutes pondering. Thinking about everything and anything. Tommy...Sadie...My album...My party...Jaime...Speaking of Jaime! I havn't talked to him today. I should call him. No, he should call me. Wait, I should call him. He is my boyfriend. Maybe I should wait until he calls me. Why am I arguing with myself? Just get out your cell phone and call him! It's not a big deal. I exhaled then reached in my pocket for my phone. Ironic as it may sound, right as I was about to punch in his number, my phone started to ring. I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was none other than Jaime himself. "I'm glad you called..." I breathed into the phone. "Long time no speak" Jaime replied. That's what I love about him. He's such a dork but still sincere. "I was just about to call you" I said. "Funny, so...excited about this friday?" he asked. I could almost see his mile long grin that I knew was plastered on his face at that very moment. "Semi" I said. "Semi? what's that mean?" he asked curiously. "Well, I love the fact that I'm finally turing 18 but the whole party thing...I'm dreading it" I stated truthfully. "You shouldn't, You'll have me there!" he said. I smiled before responding, "Yes, that's true". I heard him exhale then sigh. "Listen, Jude, I know your previous parties havn't been all that great. But this is a new beginning. A time to start new and fresh! Leave all that other crap behind!" he exclaimed. I knew he was right. He's always right. "Ok ok...I trust you on this one" I said. "Alrighty then... uh oh, Jude I gotta go. My mom made Tune Surprise for dinner. I need to go grab a burger and fries so at least I'll get some type of real food tonight." he said. I found myself laughing at the horror I could tell was in his voice. "I'll talk to you later then, see you on Friday?" I asked. "You may see me sooner than that, but I'll call you tomorrow" he said. "Ok, sounds good" I replied. "Bye Jude..." he said. "Later Jaime" I responded, then hung up.


	3. The Big Night

This is a short chapter. I will have to write more about the party on the next chapter. Thanks for reading it! lol I hope you all like it...  
-Crystal

* * *

"E.J. I don't really care what I wear…." I said, while standing on a stool feeling sharp needles occasionally poke into my backside. "Well I do. You have to look hot! How many times do you turn 18!" she exclaimed. "Well I don't think that I-- OW! Careful please! That hurt…" I said, rubbing the punctured spot I had just received on my calf. "Sorry, accident" she said. I shook my head. Sometimes she's such a klutz!

"Oh my….this is the one!" she suddenly yelled, jumping back a few feet. I could feel my body shake from her excitement. "Hey, I actually like this one" I commented, stepping down. "Of course you do! I'm the best of the best." E.J. said proudly.

I laughed, "Ok ok…so I'll be here tonight at 5:00 to get ready and the party's at 7:00 right…". E.J. tucked a stray hair behind her ear. "That's the plan! See you tonight!" she exclaimed. I snuck into the dressing room and took the dress off. "See you tonight!" I said, trying to sound as enthusiastic as possible.

Later That Night

"Jude! You look amazing!" Victoria Harrison yelled, as she saw her soon to be adult daughter standing behind the red curtain looking more nervous than ever. "Mom, tone it down a bit. I'm glad you're here" I said, exhaling.

"Of course I'm here honey….Sadie's out there with Tom. She told me to wish you the best" Victoria stated, taking hold of her daughters hand. "That's nice, tell her I'll see her in a little bit"I said. "Jude! It's Showtime" Georgia said, looking out the curtain and surveying everyone. "Coming!" I yelled. I looked back at my mom and smiled. "See you out there…" I said. "Definitely" Victoria replied. She then leftme to go back out and join everyone else.

I heard my music fill the room. This made me even more anxious. "And now everyone, give it up for the WOMAN of the night…….Miss Jude Harrison!" Kwest introduced me. I knew it wasn't just me who had heard him emphasize "woman". Everyone had heard. I stepped out and was immediately blinded by all the lights. This was going to be one hell of a night!


End file.
